But fag means cigarette!

[Nekojin]

I feel pretty,
Oh so pretty.
I feel pretty and witty and gay
West Side Story -1957

Unless Maria was really Mariano, I don't think it meant what people thinks it means.

Yeah, yeah - and the Flintstones theme song says, "We'll have a gay old time." Both of those were more than 40 years ago. The word has shifted since then.

[HYHYBT]

I have a better one: a (not very good) record I had when I was little contained a song, "Strolling Through the Zoo," to the tune of "Strolling Through the Park." The first two lines were

While strolling through the zoo today,
I can guarantee you'll soon be gay...

(I can only find one song from the album on Youtube, and it's not that one. It is, though, by far the best: "The Porcupine Is Pining for his Pork." But it's good, anyway, to know that the cause is not genetics or gestational hormone levels or absent fathers or any of that: it's listening to records.)

Still, if you are speaking in the present and to a general audience, you need to use the currently-common meanings of words. And nobody is going to believe you mean "gay as in happy" if you're clearly using it as a negative. It's nothing but a childish game, suitable for nobody older than, say, middle school (and that's pushing it).

If you had just finished talking to a woman you obviously didn't like, and the instant she left, you said "what a bitch!" you wouldn't expect witnesses to believe you were thinking about your pet dog at home. They're not likely to be that stupid.

[draco664]

That reminds me of something from my early EQ days. I was in a GBLT friendly guild at the time, which was about 80% American, 20% Aussie.

One of the (straight) Aussies would mention something about going afk to smoke a fag...the American (gay) contingent gave him all sorts of hell about it. It was pretty funny, because he took the teasing well.

I do think he broke a lot of hearts when all he ever did was have a cigarette, tho.

That reminds me of a wonderful scene in the book "Good Omens" by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman.

A witchfinder is trying to bluff his way onto a military base through a checkpoint manned by a deep-south yankee. He holds up his official 'witchfinder' ID, trying to cover the bit about "2 pence a witch found" with his thumb.

The soldier struggles to make sense of the centuries-old text, when he spots a word he recognises.

"What's this? It says here that we have to give you faggots!"
"Oh we need them."
"What for?"
"We burn them."
"Right-on!"

[gremcint]

I've encountered this before, someone actually tried to tell me they said Nicker when I called them on it. I simply said I know what I heard, you know what you said, cut it out.

[Ginger Tea]

Does anyone refere to their female dogs as bitches?
"Oh Tess is such a lovely bitch I'm sure you'll like her." without knowing Tess is a dog, it seems like you are being called a bitch too as you would like her.
Same as calling boy/girl cats toms and queens, never really encountered it.

[Hyena Dandy]

I've encountered this before, someone actually tried to tell me they said Nicker when I called them on it. I simply said I know what I heard, you know what you said, cut it out.

What would it even MEAN to call someone a Nicker... They're a fan of New York basketball teams? They steal a lot of highly inconsequential items? They have an annoying laugh?

[DrFaroohk]

Yeah, yeah - and the Flintstones theme song says, "We'll have a gay old time." Both of those were more than 40 years ago. The word has shifted since then.

You are right. They are always shifting. At one time, Fag meant Evil Homosexual. Now it means Person I Don't Like With Poor Attitude. Or something like that.

If there's a homosexual man acting all homosexual, and I'm like "Shut up faggot!" obviously, I mean the slur. If I'm playing Warcraft and yell "Oh fucking faggot!" at the rogue who just shivved me, I obviously don't mean the slur.

[Nekojin]

You are right. They are always shifting. At one time, Fag meant Evil Homosexual. Now it means Person I Don't Like With Poor Attitude. Or something like that.

Not to be rude, but that reasoning is full of shit. You're inventing a new definition to try to shift the discussion.

If there's a homosexual man acting all homosexual, and I'm like "Shut up faggot!" obviously, I mean the slur. If I'm playing Warcraft and yell "Oh fucking faggot!" at the rogue who just shivved me, I obviously don't mean the slur.

Well, technically, you're right. You're not literally calling him a homosexual. You're merely alluding to homosexuality as a stand-in for calling him weak, cowardly, and so on. Which is still slandering homosexuals.

[Andara Bledin]

Does anyone refere to their female dogs as bitches?
"Oh Tess is such a lovely bitch I'm sure you'll like her." without knowing Tess is a dog, it seems like you are being called a bitch too as you would like her.
Same as calling boy/girl cats toms and queens, never really encountered it.

The only people I've ever heard refer to a female dog as a bitch have been breeders and show people and people who are joking about their dog being both female and unruly. Similar with the cat terms; the only time they get used is when it's already determined that everybody involved is a cat person or it's used as a type of inside joke.

^-.-^

[Fezzik]

You are right. They are always shifting. At one time, Fag meant Evil Homosexual. Now it means Person I Don't Like With Poor Attitude. Or something like that.

If there's a homosexual man acting all homosexual, and I'm like "Shut up faggot!" obviously, I mean the slur. If I'm playing Warcraft and yell "Oh fucking faggot!" at the rogue who just shivved me, I obviously don't mean the slur.

It comes down to a choice. Do you want to choose to use a word you know most people think is an offensive and will consider you offensive for using, or do you choose to make an adjustment in your word choice to accommodate others? If you won't do it to be considerate, do it before it gets you in a heap of trouble.

You remind me of a guy I knew in college that liked to greet his buddies with "what's up N-word". He was white and he knew it wasn't a smart thing to do, but we were at a mostly white school so "who's gonna care?" He happened to say that one night on a deck as an African-American man was walking by who thought he was saying it to him and took offense. Long story short, the police were called and campus authorities got involved. Many months and lawyer bills later, he got off with some community service and a public apology in the student newspaper, but all of it could have been avoided if he didn't get in the habit of using that word.

[crashhelmet]

The only people I've ever heard refer to a female dog as a bitch have been breeders and show people and people who are joking about their dog being both female and unruly. Similar with the cat terms; the only time they get used is when it's already determined that everybody involved is a cat person or it's used as a type of inside joke.

^-.-^

That's about the only time I call our dog a bitch. She loves to play and she gets rougher and rougher as it goes on. You'll often here me say "Ow, you little bitch. that one hurt!" Which is kinda sad when you learn that we have a Shih Tsu.

[Ginger Tea]

Life's a Bitch, then she has puppies

[HYHYBT]

There's always Mrs. Slocombe going on about her pussy...

[bex1218]

I call my boy dogs sons of bitches. Which is true.

[Seifer]

Unfortunately, people get into the habit of using a word in a derogatory manner without realizing or understanding that by doing so, they're being derogatory to an entire group of people. A lot of people (especially young adults) like to use the word "retarded" as a derogatory term. "Man, that movie was retarded!" In this case, "retarded" means bad or stupid, and to someone who would fall under the medical category of "mentally retarded", it's an incredibly offensive thing to say.

However, just like with the use of "gay" or "fag", if you call someone on it, they'll say, "Come on, it's just a figure of speech!"