Stuff you're not supposed to talk about

[DrFaroohk]

...and other such taboo bullshit.

For instance, having some difficulties with one of my kids. I tried to bring it up to my mom, because she knows a lot about this stuff and also has been a counsilor before so she's used to hearing dark personal shit....

...So instead of getting ANY useful advice on said kid, all I get is "Don't say that!"

Yes, because you're not allowed to EVER think anything negative about your kids! Sick of this taboo shit. One time I tried to talk to some people about why one kid was really smart and the other was barely able to breathe on his own, and rather than say anything helpful, all these idiots kept jumping in with "HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT!?!?!?!!"" Fuckin assholes, every one of them.

So by that logic, all problems will go unsolved, since I'm not allowed to even THINK about it, let alone say it, so I'll just keep going about business as usual.

Thanks world!

[Andara Bledin]

Have you ever considered that it's not the content but the delivery that is at issue?

^-.-^

[anakhouri]

There is kind of a 'kids are all precious, adorable, intelligent and can be anything they want to be' mindset with a lot of adults. Since I've been spending a lot more time around kids in the past few years, I have discovered this is not true. There are a lot of unpleasant, unattractive, dumb kids out there. But I rarely say this to anyone lest they jump on me for being a kid-hating bitch.

So I can kind of see that. But since you are talking about a child who lives in your house and for whom you are responsible, you might want to phrase it more nicely than I just did. "Kid seems to be having difficulty with behavioral issues/learning problems etc." (I doubt you'd tell anyone your kid is ugly, it's not like anything can be done about it anyway even if he was, but the other things can be helped).

[crashhelmet]

There is kind of a 'kids are all precious, adorable, intelligent and can be anything they want to be' mindset with a lot of adults. Since I've been spending a lot more time around kids in the past few years, I have discovered this is not true. There are a lot of unpleasant, unattractive, dumb kids out there. But I rarely say this to anyone lest they jump on me for being a kid-hating bitch.

The only kids that are perfect and could NEVER do anything wrong are the children and grandchildren of those that have that opinion. And that opinion only seems to surface when someone else is telling them about their kid/grandkid.

Andara may be on to something with the delivery aspect. It might not be what you're saying, but rather how you're saying it.

[Andara Bledin]

I'm an expert at saying the right thing in the wrong way.

My PoV is somewhere to the side of the rest of the world, it seems, so what I think irrelevant sugar-coating is what other people consider necessary white-wash.

However, rather than rail about how the rest of the world doesn't understand me, I try to figure out how to be better at communicating with the rest of the world. It's not quite as satisfying as making them bend to my (obviously superior ) way of doing things, but it's a hell of a lot more likely to actually work.

^-.-^

[bara]

George Carlin said it best

"Kids are just like everyone else, a few winners and WHOLE lot of losers"

But I will agree that when problems are over looked because 'they are just children' is a stupid ass way of doing things.
Im not to concerned about the little boy who gets curious and looks at dads playboy. I will however become concerned if a boy starts grabbin ass on every girl he sees.

One of those is perfectly natural. The other is a pretty good indicator that something may be amiss.

[jackfaire]

Yeah that "all kids are these cute innocent little creatures" Overlooks some serious damage that some kids have. The ones that spend their free time being little monsters don't usually grow up to be nice people.

It's not cute that little johnny kicked little Suzy or psychologically abused her because it's kind of an indicator of how he is going to always treat girls unless someone intervenes.