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I thought about putting this in religion, but I figured it would fit better here, since it's really more of a personal problem than a religious one.
As many of you know, I am a Christian. I've grown up in a rather conservative environment, and many of my friends fall under this ideology, as do my parents. I used to fall under the same ideology until I started questioning it. I am a registered Republican, and will probably remain as such for the foreseeable future, but it doesn't entirely represent my feelings too well. I'm really much more of a centrist - I agree with both "sides" on a lot of issues. Indeed, I hate the entire "us vs. them" mentality to begin with, and while I'm not arrogant enough to proclaim that I escape it entirely, I do try my best to avoid it.
How is this relevant? Well, I am hammered right now. Just blind drunk. As a Christian, many of my friends don't approve of my habits in this regard. Or my music listening choices (currently listening to AC/DC at the moment
) I was with my more secular friends and wanted to have a good time, and I drank quite a bit.
I'm tired of being judged in this regard by certain people. I like to drink socially. It's just something I enjoy doing. I don't do it too often, though when I do it tends to be quite excessive, I admit. And if you're concerned about me for health reasons, I honestly appreciate it. But if you're concerned about me for religious reasons, then seriously, just shut the fuck up.
I'm tired of hearing some friends of mine brag about how they don't drink or engage in sexual intercourse because they're super-Christians, or they stay pure, or whatever. And what sucks is, I used to be one of them. I used to be "that guy". The guy who would tell you how he never drank or did anything that might make God upset.
Well, I would love to tell them that Jesus' main message was concern over how I treat other people. And that, I do. I have love. I genuinely do. I love other people. I have that, and it's all I need.
You know what one of my friends did? Ok, so we're a bunch of nerds, and we started mock-debating about what would happen if Captain America was to fall to the earth and block the planet with his shield, and the physics behind that. One of the friends in this conversation started lecturing us about how crazy it is that the laws of physics are so minute that if one of them is messed us, they all get messed up. "It's almost like somebody designed them all and planned them out!" he said.
It takes a special kind of person to proclaim something that I essentially agree with and still say "Wow, what a jackass
" afterwards. I mean, I definitely think that evolution is a thing and all that (another thing that this particular friend will lecture you on), and that a lot of evolution theories are essentially right, but I believe that God guided it. I'm not a young earther, unlike this particular person I'm currently complaining about.
The same person who liked to tell me how he doesn't drink, because losing control isn't something he wants to do. Fine, but he can stop telling me what a bad person I am because I drink occasionally.
Let me tell you a story. I don't like telling this story, because I really don't want to make somebody else look bad and glorify myself. I think that goes against what I should be doing largely. So I'm going to change some details about it so I'm not doing that. I probably wouldn't even be sharing this story if I hadn't been drinking all night, but here it goes.
So we went on a mission trip to a halfway house in England in late 2008. It was a large group of us, including me and the one person who I'm particularly complaining about. One night, we were at the Bullring (an extremely large outdoor mall) and the two of us, particularly ,had not eaten all day, literally. I admit, I can't remember why. Anyways, we went to a Subway inside and grabbed some subs for ourselves. As we walked out, a homeless man approached us and said he was stranded, hungry, and needed food. I admit, part of the reason I handed over my meal was because I was caught with it in my hands. I couldn't say "I have no food", obviously. So I gave him my food. My friend said "You know, he could've been scamming you." My response was "Well, if he was scamming me for some reason, he probably still needed the food more than me."
I am a middle class straight white Christian American. I make no apologies for this. But, I try to recognize that no matter how hard things get, I am essentially, in the grand scheme of things, rather privileged, and I try to help out where I can. I want to give. I don't want to take. So I don't think God cares if I drink, or if I need some sexual release, or if I don't go to church. And I'm tired of being judged for it, by this friend and by others whom I used to go to church with. Even if what I do is sinning in some way, well, "Love covers up a multitude of sins."
I guess I just needed to let off some steam. I'm not looking for people to tell me what a good person I am, or anything of the sort. I'm just...frustrated, and annoyed. It only enhances my depression when I'm judged and am attempted to be forced back into church by people I hardly even respect. That's exactly why I stopped going to church. I'm a Christian. I'm not part of the religious right - I'm simply a Christian, who wants to do my best.
Sorry about the typos - again, drunk
I'm usually extremely picky about my grammar and spelling, so I'll probably come back and fix this tomorrow, but in the meantime, enjoy watching me fuck up the one thing I'm good at and specialize in, and feel free to make fun of me for it I won't be offended.
Have a good night everybody. I appreciate the general acceptance I've gotten from you guys since my recent return, and I appreciate you putting up with my self-effacing topics
As many of you know, I am a Christian. I've grown up in a rather conservative environment, and many of my friends fall under this ideology, as do my parents. I used to fall under the same ideology until I started questioning it. I am a registered Republican, and will probably remain as such for the foreseeable future, but it doesn't entirely represent my feelings too well. I'm really much more of a centrist - I agree with both "sides" on a lot of issues. Indeed, I hate the entire "us vs. them" mentality to begin with, and while I'm not arrogant enough to proclaim that I escape it entirely, I do try my best to avoid it.
How is this relevant? Well, I am hammered right now. Just blind drunk. As a Christian, many of my friends don't approve of my habits in this regard. Or my music listening choices (currently listening to AC/DC at the moment
) I was with my more secular friends and wanted to have a good time, and I drank quite a bit.I'm tired of being judged in this regard by certain people. I like to drink socially. It's just something I enjoy doing. I don't do it too often, though when I do it tends to be quite excessive, I admit. And if you're concerned about me for health reasons, I honestly appreciate it. But if you're concerned about me for religious reasons, then seriously, just shut the fuck up.
I'm tired of hearing some friends of mine brag about how they don't drink or engage in sexual intercourse because they're super-Christians, or they stay pure, or whatever. And what sucks is, I used to be one of them. I used to be "that guy". The guy who would tell you how he never drank or did anything that might make God upset.
Well, I would love to tell them that Jesus' main message was concern over how I treat other people. And that, I do. I have love. I genuinely do. I love other people. I have that, and it's all I need.
You know what one of my friends did? Ok, so we're a bunch of nerds, and we started mock-debating about what would happen if Captain America was to fall to the earth and block the planet with his shield, and the physics behind that. One of the friends in this conversation started lecturing us about how crazy it is that the laws of physics are so minute that if one of them is messed us, they all get messed up. "It's almost like somebody designed them all and planned them out!" he said.
It takes a special kind of person to proclaim something that I essentially agree with and still say "Wow, what a jackass
" afterwards. I mean, I definitely think that evolution is a thing and all that (another thing that this particular friend will lecture you on), and that a lot of evolution theories are essentially right, but I believe that God guided it. I'm not a young earther, unlike this particular person I'm currently complaining about.The same person who liked to tell me how he doesn't drink, because losing control isn't something he wants to do. Fine, but he can stop telling me what a bad person I am because I drink occasionally.
Let me tell you a story. I don't like telling this story, because I really don't want to make somebody else look bad and glorify myself. I think that goes against what I should be doing largely. So I'm going to change some details about it so I'm not doing that. I probably wouldn't even be sharing this story if I hadn't been drinking all night, but here it goes.
So we went on a mission trip to a halfway house in England in late 2008. It was a large group of us, including me and the one person who I'm particularly complaining about. One night, we were at the Bullring (an extremely large outdoor mall) and the two of us, particularly ,had not eaten all day, literally. I admit, I can't remember why. Anyways, we went to a Subway inside and grabbed some subs for ourselves. As we walked out, a homeless man approached us and said he was stranded, hungry, and needed food. I admit, part of the reason I handed over my meal was because I was caught with it in my hands. I couldn't say "I have no food", obviously. So I gave him my food. My friend said "You know, he could've been scamming you." My response was "Well, if he was scamming me for some reason, he probably still needed the food more than me."
I am a middle class straight white Christian American. I make no apologies for this. But, I try to recognize that no matter how hard things get, I am essentially, in the grand scheme of things, rather privileged, and I try to help out where I can. I want to give. I don't want to take. So I don't think God cares if I drink, or if I need some sexual release, or if I don't go to church. And I'm tired of being judged for it, by this friend and by others whom I used to go to church with. Even if what I do is sinning in some way, well, "Love covers up a multitude of sins."
I guess I just needed to let off some steam. I'm not looking for people to tell me what a good person I am, or anything of the sort. I'm just...frustrated, and annoyed. It only enhances my depression when I'm judged and am attempted to be forced back into church by people I hardly even respect. That's exactly why I stopped going to church. I'm a Christian. I'm not part of the religious right - I'm simply a Christian, who wants to do my best.
Sorry about the typos - again, drunk
I'm usually extremely picky about my grammar and spelling, so I'll probably come back and fix this tomorrow, but in the meantime, enjoy watching me fuck up the one thing I'm good at and specialize in, and feel free to make fun of me for it I won't be offended.Have a good night everybody. I appreciate the general acceptance I've gotten from you guys since my recent return, and I appreciate you putting up with my self-effacing topics
.
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