From the guy who wrote this thread comes something so unbelievable that it would have to be true! Most of the backstory about me is in there in various posts throughout the thread.
Well...fuck me sideways, things just got worse with my parents.
It all started last night. I have a shitty internet connection that barely works on a good day. I'm pretty surprised it's working now. Well, in typical my connection form, it went to shit last night at about 10 or so and stopped working completely. I didn't think anything of it since I was tired anyway and went to bed without troubleshooting.
I woke up this morning, and it was still off. Sometime between 9 and 10:30--nearly 12 hours later--it decided to bring itself back to life. I'd stayed in my room the majority of the morning until I got hungry and went out to the kitchen to grab some grub. That's when it all started.
My mom sees me walk into the kitchen and begins to rant about how I'm evil because my special snowflake of a brother who can do no wrong didn't have any Internet access on his iPod before he went to school this morning. (Funny. Back in my day, I'd get a verbal reaming for using the Internet before school--especially if it was on something that looked like a Game Boy. Whatever.) But he had HOMEWORK to do, damn it, and he needs Internet through his iPod to get his homework done!
First of all, I also didn't have Internet access last night and didn't have it until this morning around two hours after I woke up. Why in fuck's name, when I also had things I needed to download, would I be so evil as to affect myself with my imaginary conniving plan to destroy the Internet for everyone?
Second of all, fuck that shit. iPods are used for listening to music and playing games. How in fuck's name he was able to convince anyone that playing "Gangnam Style" at max volume was somehow homework is a fucking idiot. On top of that, our school system just gave every kid a netbook. On that netbook? Internet access through Verizon, which can be used for--drumroll, please--homework, even when my connection goes on vacation! The only difference between my connection and the Verizon connection is the Verizon card has a software program installed on it in the firmware by the school to keep people from going to less-than-desirable or distracting websites.
But is that good enough? No. Absolutely not. The Verizon connection is soo slow, according to my technologically-illiterate mother, who has never used a computer in her life and got pissed when I wanted to give her one to use. You know, if I really had an assignment to do that was that important--which my brother didn't, he just wanted to fuck around with "Gangnam Style" and make it look like he was actually doing something--I'd accept a slow connection over no connection.
Hell, the Verizon 4G is about 15 million times faster than what I used back in the day. You see, when we first got computers at that school, everything was on dial-up. Yes, even the network was dial-up. I remember the day I was typing my thesis. I'll be damned if the word processor I'd VPN'd into didn't crash and eat my whole fucking paper since the school was batshit crazy enough to not install the auto-save feature (or opt for reliable storage when we did manage to save to the network). So, yes, I'd rather have the Verizon netbook than to deal with the shitty dial-up VPN of my day.
But it gets more interesting. My dad didn't like my explanation that the Internet was down for everyone, so he came at me and pinned me down to the living room chair while striking me in the side of the head with his fists. (No, I didn't fight back. I couldn't.) I'm an adult, so I call the police to my house with intentions to press charges.
The police show up and send three officers. Now, if you read my other rant, you'll remember how my mom basically lied to the police last time and got me thrown out of the station for no reason whatsoever. This time was better.
As I'm talking to the officer, my mom runs out of the house crying like a banshee. Just as I think the woman has blown a mental gasket, she runs up to one of the police officers that responded and starts telling him everyone she knows down at the city precinct and how in hell could you possibly think poor little me or meek little Dad could do such a thing. Naturally through all of this, my mom and the officer seem to have some formed an indirect friendship of some kind, and--you won't believe this--the police was no longer interested in the charges I was going to press. Instead, he began telling me what a lazy bum I was.
Seriously, what the actual fuck? I have a lot of respect for the police--even after the shenanigans they pulled last time--but this just made me furious. How the fuck can you honestly say your job is to protect and serve if you're going to just drop a sure-fire battery charge after my mom goes on and on hysterically about everyone she knows? Fuck!
Oh, wait a second--and this is absolutely true, I kid you not--I almost forgot the time I witnessed one of the officers that responded sucking Ready-Whip off her female organs when I was about three.
After all this circle-jerking, the cops shrug off my complaint and tell me to go to my grandparents' house to stay for a while. Okay, I thought. My grandparents are cool. No sooner than 10 seconds after we all got back in the house, my mom picks up the phone and tells a bald-faced lie about the whole thing in order to turn my grandparents against me so I couldn't leave hell for a few hours and seek asylum in a safe location.
Why did I post this in "Things I Hate", you ask? Well, I hate it when people try to physically alter my face just because they didn't like (or didn't understand, for that matter) an answer I gave them to a rant. I also hate it when the police completely shrug something like this off. Ain't it great to have literally nowhere to turn when someone nearly beats the shit out of you because someone supposedly knows somebody--or something like that? Not that I'd ever do it, but I wonder what level of crime the police be willing to let me get away with if I befriended a cop or two? Apparently, battery is the ground floor.
I wish I could get out of this place. Swear to God I'm usually a nice guy who keeps to himself until bullpucky like this happens, but everyone involved in this situation can go fuck a buffalo. I'm getting pretty tired of this shit.
Well...fuck me sideways, things just got worse with my parents.
It all started last night. I have a shitty internet connection that barely works on a good day. I'm pretty surprised it's working now. Well, in typical my connection form, it went to shit last night at about 10 or so and stopped working completely. I didn't think anything of it since I was tired anyway and went to bed without troubleshooting.
I woke up this morning, and it was still off. Sometime between 9 and 10:30--nearly 12 hours later--it decided to bring itself back to life. I'd stayed in my room the majority of the morning until I got hungry and went out to the kitchen to grab some grub. That's when it all started.
My mom sees me walk into the kitchen and begins to rant about how I'm evil because my special snowflake of a brother who can do no wrong didn't have any Internet access on his iPod before he went to school this morning. (Funny. Back in my day, I'd get a verbal reaming for using the Internet before school--especially if it was on something that looked like a Game Boy. Whatever.) But he had HOMEWORK to do, damn it, and he needs Internet through his iPod to get his homework done!
First of all, I also didn't have Internet access last night and didn't have it until this morning around two hours after I woke up. Why in fuck's name, when I also had things I needed to download, would I be so evil as to affect myself with my imaginary conniving plan to destroy the Internet for everyone?
Second of all, fuck that shit. iPods are used for listening to music and playing games. How in fuck's name he was able to convince anyone that playing "Gangnam Style" at max volume was somehow homework is a fucking idiot. On top of that, our school system just gave every kid a netbook. On that netbook? Internet access through Verizon, which can be used for--drumroll, please--homework, even when my connection goes on vacation! The only difference between my connection and the Verizon connection is the Verizon card has a software program installed on it in the firmware by the school to keep people from going to less-than-desirable or distracting websites.
But is that good enough? No. Absolutely not. The Verizon connection is soo slow, according to my technologically-illiterate mother, who has never used a computer in her life and got pissed when I wanted to give her one to use. You know, if I really had an assignment to do that was that important--which my brother didn't, he just wanted to fuck around with "Gangnam Style" and make it look like he was actually doing something--I'd accept a slow connection over no connection.
Hell, the Verizon 4G is about 15 million times faster than what I used back in the day. You see, when we first got computers at that school, everything was on dial-up. Yes, even the network was dial-up. I remember the day I was typing my thesis. I'll be damned if the word processor I'd VPN'd into didn't crash and eat my whole fucking paper since the school was batshit crazy enough to not install the auto-save feature (or opt for reliable storage when we did manage to save to the network). So, yes, I'd rather have the Verizon netbook than to deal with the shitty dial-up VPN of my day.
But it gets more interesting. My dad didn't like my explanation that the Internet was down for everyone, so he came at me and pinned me down to the living room chair while striking me in the side of the head with his fists. (No, I didn't fight back. I couldn't.) I'm an adult, so I call the police to my house with intentions to press charges.
The police show up and send three officers. Now, if you read my other rant, you'll remember how my mom basically lied to the police last time and got me thrown out of the station for no reason whatsoever. This time was better.
As I'm talking to the officer, my mom runs out of the house crying like a banshee. Just as I think the woman has blown a mental gasket, she runs up to one of the police officers that responded and starts telling him everyone she knows down at the city precinct and how in hell could you possibly think poor little me or meek little Dad could do such a thing. Naturally through all of this, my mom and the officer seem to have some formed an indirect friendship of some kind, and--you won't believe this--the police was no longer interested in the charges I was going to press. Instead, he began telling me what a lazy bum I was.
Seriously, what the actual fuck? I have a lot of respect for the police--even after the shenanigans they pulled last time--but this just made me furious. How the fuck can you honestly say your job is to protect and serve if you're going to just drop a sure-fire battery charge after my mom goes on and on hysterically about everyone she knows? Fuck!
Oh, wait a second--and this is absolutely true, I kid you not--I almost forgot the time I witnessed one of the officers that responded sucking Ready-Whip off her female organs when I was about three.
After all this circle-jerking, the cops shrug off my complaint and tell me to go to my grandparents' house to stay for a while. Okay, I thought. My grandparents are cool. No sooner than 10 seconds after we all got back in the house, my mom picks up the phone and tells a bald-faced lie about the whole thing in order to turn my grandparents against me so I couldn't leave hell for a few hours and seek asylum in a safe location.
Why did I post this in "Things I Hate", you ask? Well, I hate it when people try to physically alter my face just because they didn't like (or didn't understand, for that matter) an answer I gave them to a rant. I also hate it when the police completely shrug something like this off. Ain't it great to have literally nowhere to turn when someone nearly beats the shit out of you because someone supposedly knows somebody--or something like that? Not that I'd ever do it, but I wonder what level of crime the police be willing to let me get away with if I befriended a cop or two? Apparently, battery is the ground floor.
I wish I could get out of this place. Swear to God I'm usually a nice guy who keeps to himself until bullpucky like this happens, but everyone involved in this situation can go fuck a buffalo. I'm getting pretty tired of this shit.
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