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  • Gum chewing

    I think perhaps some of the truest words ever spoken (or sang) on film were in
    Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory
    and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

    Gum chewing's fine when it's once in a while
    It stops you from smoking and brightens your smile
    But it's repulsive, revoulting, and wrong. Chewing and chewing all day long
    The way that a cow does
    Veruca Salt: Will Violet always be a blueberry?
    Willy Wonka: No. Maybe. I dunno. But that's what you get from chewing gum all day, it's just disgusting.
    Chewing gum is really gross, chewing gum I hate the most.

    Now I know that obviously these lovely little quotes don't apply to everyone that enjoys gum, but for the most part, it seems like people can't chew the damn stuff with their mouth closed, or without popping bubbles every thirty seconds so that the rest of us have to listen to it squashing and smacking and lolling around in their mouth while they chomp away like a farm animal. Seriously, it sounds like a [slightly] smaller version of our horses licking out their feed boxes! It's especially bad if you're in a setting like an office/cinema/church. And for the love of all that is good and decent, I don't want to see the glorious wad, either. Some of the most attractive people can become hideous, to me at least, in the blink of an eye as soon as I see their half-chewed gum rolling around because they can't seem to have a sense of etiquette with it. I'm not saying people shouldn't chew, but just to be . . . less nasty about it.

    It's been bugging me more as of late because when Mom does her weekly shopping, she grabs some stuff from the impulse buy at the checkout, and nephew, for the past couple of months, has decided he wants a pack of Stride instead of a candy bar. Then of course he shares it with everyone, so for about three days, all I can hear is them smacking away on it. Right now a movie is playing, on a surround sound system, and I'm at the computer with my headphones on listening to a soundtrack. I can STILL hear the smacking a popping. GAH!
    A.K.A. ShinyGreenApple

  • #2
    I am gumophobic, and have been since I touched the underside of a public table. It disgusts me. Most people have the decency to keep their mouthes closed so that you don't see the gum and don't even know they're chewing, but everyone I see someone chewing gum, as in I can see the wad rolling around in their mouth, I shudder.

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    • #3
      I chew gum a lot, but then, my mum always taught me to keep my mouth shut when eating. The people who roll gum around their mouths or chew it with their mouths open, are more than likely the same people who sit there eating with all the chewed up food rolling round their gob like a cement mixer. X_x Maybe your rant should be about anything chewing, rather than just singling out gum chewers? It all boils down to manners in the end.

      Btw, check the book. I can't remember it all now, but the song the Oompa Loompas sing in the book is about ten times better than the one in the original film. XD
      Last edited by Lace Neil Singer; 11-08-2008, 03:07 PM.
      "Oh wow, I can't believe how stupid I used to be and you still are."

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      • #4
        Once in a while, I don't mind chewing gum. But I know certain people that I've never seen without gum and it bothers me.
        Violence has resolved more conflicts than anything else. The contrary opinion that violence doesn't solve anything is merely wishful thinking at its worst. - Starship Troopers

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        • #5
          Oh yeah, and cuz I have too much time on my hands; here is the song from the book:

          http://www.roalddahlfans.com/books/charsongs.php

          "Dear friends, we surely all agree
          There's almost nothing worse to see
          Than some repulsive little bum
          Who's always chewing chewing gum.
          (It's very near as bad as those
          Who sit around and pick the nose).
          So please believe us when we say
          That chewing gum will never pay;
          This sticky habit's bound to send
          The chewer to a sticky end.
          Did any of you ever know
          A person called Miss Bigelow?
          This dreadful woman saw no wrong
          In chewing, chewing all day long.
          She chewed while bathing in the tub,
          She chewed while dancing at her club,
          She chewed in church and on the bus;
          It really was quite ludicrous!
          And when she couldn't find her gum,
          She'd chew up the linoleum,
          Or anything that happened near–
          A pair of boots, the postman's ear,
          Or other people's underclothes,
          And once she chewed her boy friend's nose.
          She went on chewing till, at last,
          Her chewing muscles grew so vast
          That from her face her giant chin
          Stuck out just like a violin.
          For years and years she chewed away,
          Consuming fifty packs a day,
          Until one summer's eve, alas,
          A horrid business came to pass.
          Miss Bigelow went late to bed,
          For half an hour she lay and read,
          Chewing and chewing all the while
          Like some great clockwork crocodile.
          At last, she put her gum away
          Upon a special little tray,
          And settled back and went to sleep–
          (She managed this by counting sheep).
          But now, how strange! Although she slept,
          Those massive jaws of hers still kept
          On chewing, chewing through the night,
          Even with nothing there to bite.
          They were, you see, in such a groove
          They positively had to move.
          And very grim it was to hear
          In pitchy darkness, loud and clear,
          This sleeping woman's great big trap
          Opening and shutting, snap–snap–snap!
          Faster and faster, chop–chop–chop,
          The noise went on, it wouldn't stop.
          Until at last her jaws decide
          To pause and open extra wide,
          And with the most tremendous chew
          They bit the lady's tongue in two.
          Thereafter, just from chewing gum,
          Miss Bigelow was always dumb,
          And spent her life shut up in some
          Disgusting sanatorium.
          And that is why we'll try so hard
          To save Miss Violet Beauregard
          From suffering an equal fate.
          She's still quite young. It's not too late,
          Provided she survives the cure.
          We hope she does. We can't be sure."
          "Oh wow, I can't believe how stupid I used to be and you still are."

          Comment


          • #6
            I used to chew gum a lot when I was a kid . . . Bubbalicious strawberry was my favorite.

            That got replaced by the cigarettes . . . once in a rare while will I chew gum. Mostly I've lost the taste for it.

            And besides, I find it's been getting on my nerves lately. My mom will smack gum in the car and all I'll hear is "smack/clack/smack/clack . . . ." She'll even do it inside the house and I'll hear her from 3 rooms away!

            It's a wonder I haven't went homicidal yet . . .
            If life hands you lemons . . . find someone whose life is handing them vodka . . . and have a party - Ron "Tater Salad" White

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            • #7
              Bah, if chewing gum stopped you from smoking, I would have never started.

              I love to blow big bubbles and crack them very loudly. In front of people I don't like. To wake them up.

              Sorry. They deserve it. You're here to work, not to sleep or do nothing.

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              • #8
                I know, I'm right there with you. It's annoying. I mean, I'll chew it if I have a dry mouth, but I'll spit it out withing minutes. I don't want to walk around looking like I have a cheek full of chaw. I get bored with it pretty quick. I mean, I dont' mind if people chew gum, but these people who constantly and unconsiously pop it all day have got to go. Ditto the open-mouth people.

                Except this guy. He can chew all the gum he wants. He can even show it to me, if he likes (I suspect I'd be happy to see just about anything he wanted to show me, but I digress):
                www.youtube.com/watch?v=tR-5ZStR8r4

                I suspect it keeps his throat moist. But it's funny to me that he is doing this with a moutfull of gum.
                Last edited by RecoveringKinkoid; 11-11-2008, 06:40 PM.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Lace Neil Singer View Post
                  Oh yeah, and cuz I have too much time on my hands; here is the song from the book:
                  you sure you got it all? I recall the songs the oompa-loompas sang from the book went several pages!

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                  • #10
                    That's all for the gum chewing song; maybe your books had either large print or small pages. XD Click the link; there are others.
                    "Oh wow, I can't believe how stupid I used to be and you still are."

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                    • #11
                      Nope, standard novel size. The songs took me about 20 mins to go through. Just gigantic. Could put Meatloaf to shame.

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                      • #12
                        Well, that's the complete song; there's nothing missing, I dug out my old book and checked.
                        "Oh wow, I can't believe how stupid I used to be and you still are."

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                        • #13
                          Chewing gum is one of the ways I try to counteract the urge to eat when I'm not actually hungry. I do have a tendency sometimes to just impulsively eat partly because a food item sounds good, despite not being actually hungry. I also don't snap my gum unless I'm either alone or with people who don't care though.

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