Controlling, Lazy, Bitchy Baby Mamas!

[blas87]

There's not a whole lot you can do.

She's already tried to retort to my brother that she doesn't "want" his support or help, yet she whines on Facebook about the cost of formula and WIC not giving her enough checks, and a few months back she was whining to him that he should give her a reloadable Wal-Mart card or send her money orders. And this was before we had the test results.

[smileyeagle1021]

This is what I hate; the man is _required_ to pay child support. Fine, I agree with that. But when Baby Mama is unhappy she cuts off all access to the child and the man has _no_ say in the matter!

Sorry, she's cuts you off then he should be allowed to cut _her_ off! But if he does _he_ goes to jail! Where's the equality?

The equality is that everyone knows that the only people truly suitable to raise a child are presumably heterosexual women who have given birth. Since a man is unable to go through labor, they clearly will never love a child as much as a woman (funny, I would think going through 9 months of hell followed by a couple of hours of the most excruciating pain imaginable would put someone off of a child, but I'm just a dumb man, what would I know). This is one area that really bothers me with women's lib, I agree that women should be equal, the pay gap and the opportunity gaps are appalling... but the movement loses a little sympathy when they start claiming they are all for equality of the sexes then do nothing to fight the inequality in the family court system that assumes that a woman is automatically a better parent because she has a vagina.

[Ginger Tea]

One of my brothers friends has 3 children with his ex, he has custody but not once was she made to pay child support.

A former co worker years ago had about 3 children via different mothers, his Ex the fling that caused his wife to be his ex and his future wife, UK rules at the time (they may have just changed to it IDK) meant that the money he paid out was split between each child, so his child with his Ex ended up with only 1/3 of what he used to get, which he said was good in a way as his Ex just squandered the money and he was granted custody a bit before he left our work.

[fireheart17]

Both populations (baby mamas and baby daddies) have their assholes, but I too have experienced the crazy mamas firsthand.

A friend of mine has 2 kids under 5 and is also dating a guy with 2/3 (not sure which) children. She has near-full custody of her kids due to the father being an abusive shit and being in jail (and he also has no desire to see the kids and the kids get upset when they see him...no coaching on mum's part!).

The date's kids however...the mother set up custody so the two kids that I'm aware of do not see their dad at the same time.

[Mytical]

The equality is that everyone knows that the only people truly suitable to raise a child are presumably heterosexual women who have given birth. Since a man is unable to go through labor, they clearly will never love a child as much as a woman (funny, I would think going through 9 months of hell followed by a couple of hours of the most excruciating pain imaginable would put someone off of a child, but I'm just a dumb man, what would I know). This is one area that really bothers me with women's lib, I agree that women should be equal, the pay gap and the opportunity gaps are appalling... but the movement loses a little sympathy when they start claiming they are all for equality of the sexes then do nothing to fight the inequality in the family court system that assumes that a woman is automatically a better parent because she has a vagina.

Don't get me started on this. Oops to late.. gonna anger a few people here. See I think men and women should be equal, but they are not. Currently, men are getting the short end of the stick here. We have limited/no say if a woman should get an abortion or not. Is it fair that if the father wants the child, the woman can just say 'nope' and that is the end of it?*

If two people with equal qualifications try for a job, sorry Mr. White Male Applicant .. law says we got to give it to the other person. That is NOT equal, that is lopsided. If a guy experiences sexual harassment at work .. chances are he won't report it NOT because he wants/likes the harassment, but because he will be laughed at or outright ignored. I mean after all, a guy should like a woman hitting on him... right?

I get told all the time that as a White male (Which I am more Native American, but since I look white that is all that matters) I should just shut up and 'take it like a man', because some white person in the past was an ahole. White male privilege and all that jazz..things I had NO Part in, could not control, or wanted anything to do with. Yet there are many instances that was meant to be 'equal' is not, it is very lopsided. But hey.. I am just a white male, I should just shut up and take it like a man....

*Keep in mind I am pro-choice.

[s_stabeler]

to be honest, I don't massively care about a woman being able to get an abortion regardless of the father's feelings- on the grounds that, ultimately, with pregnancy, all of the risk is on the mother.

I agree with he rest of what you said, though.

[fireheart17]

to be honest, I don't massively care about a woman being able to get an abortion regardless of the father's feelings- on the grounds that, ultimately, with pregnancy, all of the risk is on the mother.

Pretty much this. A woman is not an incubator and should never be treated as such. Until we can implant uteruses (uterii?) into men, whether or not a woman has an abortion is entirely up to her.

[smileyeagle1021]

If a guy experiences sexual harassment at work .. chances are he won't report it NOT because he wants/likes the harassment, but because he will be laughed at or outright ignored. I mean after all, a guy should like a woman hitting on him... right?

So true... I've had exactly that happen. Obviously every man loves being hit on by women... even the ones who aren't interested in women

[siead_lietrathua]

to be honest, I don't massively care about a woman being able to get an abortion regardless of the father's feelings- on the grounds that, ultimately, with pregnancy, all of the risk is on the mother.

I agree with he rest of what you said, though.

Pretty much this. A woman is not an incubator and should never be treated as such. Until we can implant uteruses (uterii?) into men, whether or not a woman has an abortion is entirely up to her.

i have to semi-disagree on this.
don't get me wrong, i do believe it's a women's choice.
however, if it's a couple in a stable relationship, they should be able to sit and discuss the pregnancy and what to do about it rationally. they should come together as a partnership and weigh all their options. a loving partner will want what is best for their partner's health and sanity, including an abortion if they decide that's the only course to achieve that goal.

there's an unfair harshness to saying a man that only sees a woman once in a while for a booty call, and a man that's been married to a woman for 10+ years through many trials, should have the same level of zero opinion on their possible children.

please note i highlighted stable relationship. obviously in a case where a it's an abusive or otherwise unstable relationship, those factors need to be weighed in as well.

[s_stabeler]

we were talking about said man having a formal say in if the woman in question can abort. Can they discuss it? certainly. But the man disagreeing should not be a bar to the woman being able to abort the foetus.