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My in-laws' reaction to my haircut

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  • My in-laws' reaction to my haircut

    When I say "haircut", I mean "head shaved". Think Sinead O'Connor. Not skin bald. The barber went to shave my head with the clippers until the stubble was as close to my head as it could get.

    Yes, it's drastic. For those who follow me on Facebook, I posted a picture of myself on my feed celebrating Mother's Day.

    Hubby went down to Virginia this past Friday. He showed his parents, and BIL#2 and his wife the picture of me.

    The one question that was asked (and was relayed to me via my husband because Twinkle & I were both sick) that sticks in my craw is:

    How could you let Rummy do that?

    Really? My husband "let" me shave my head!? What am I, my husband's property? I did discuss it with my husband, but my husband is smart enough that:

    a. He, like me, realize it's hair and it'll grow back.
    b. I'm a 42 year old woman and if I want to shave my head, I'll shave my head.

    Also, apparently, men like women with long flowing hair. WTF? What about the women (like my MIL) who like to keep their hair short? Or the women, for whatever reason can't have long hair (or any hair)?

    I just tell myself that they're jealous I pull off the shaved head look better than my BIL#2 (he has an odd shaped, lumpy head) and I'm causing my MIL & SIL to question how femininity can look.
    Oh Holy Trinity, the Goddess Caffeine'Na, the Great Cowthulhu, & The Doctor, Who Art in Tardis, give me strength. Moo. Moo. Java. Timey Wimey

    Avatar says: DAVID TENNANT More Evidence God is a Woman

  • #2
    To quote the great Taylor Swift:

    "Haters gonna hate"
    Violence has resolved more conflicts than anything else. The contrary opinion that violence doesn't solve anything is merely wishful thinking at its worst. - Starship Troopers

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    • #3
      Yeah, I think they are jealous. You did something that you wanted to do that went against the "norm". People don't like that, you see. People want you to fit into this nice neat little box of what they say you ought to do.

      Good on you for shaving your head.

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      • #4
        I did something similar twice - in 1995 when I got dx with my first round of cancer, I had almost butt length hair, and I chopped it to shoulder length in prep to go shorter if chemo blasted my folicles. Major response was "What will your husband say when he gets back from sea??!eleventy!" so I pulled the braid out of my backpack. I carefully dipped the two cut ends in wax, and decoratively bound with floss the braid right after I chopped it and said "If he misses my hair, he can take it with him next time he goes out to sea" cue gasps. And I just chopped off my butt length hair back in January, though this time it was for the hell of it. Though the first time I cut my hair at 15, it was knee length, and I had to resort to grabbing the lady's scissors, my braid at the back of my neck and chopping - she objected to cutting my hair, I wanted it 2 inches long. At least I got multiple hundreds of $$ for selling off the 3+ feet of hair

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        • #5
          I don't get why people see something like hair cutting as anyone else's business. You cut your hair for your own reasons, it shouldn't matter what others will think or if they approve. I hate how much of a conversation it becomes. When I cut 2ft of my hair off, I had to explain to everyone who saw the difference about why I didn't donate what I cut off. It was too dyed (by the end, it was too damaged as well) and too layered. I got some suggestions of just letting it grow out till that wouldn't be a problem. It's already down to my knees! While it's a worthy cause, some of the comments I got made me want point out that I wasn't a hair farm. One of the biggest reasons I was apprehensive about cutting my hair was that I didn't want to deal with all the conversations about it.

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          • #6
            while I'll admit that someone changing their hairstyle would look somewhat odd to me, it's a) not limited to women- I find it looks odd whenever ANYONE makes a big change to their hairstyle- and b) not really my business. ( so I'll generally keep my thoughts to myself)

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            • #7
              My grandmother had this reaction when I showed off my really short hair. Although she's not fluent in English, she managed to tell me that I looked like a BOY, and that "LONG HAIR IS BEAUTY!"

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              • #8
                Thanks everyone for the feedback!

                Y'all are, I think, hitting the nails on the heads.

                I've gotten nothing but compliments in person and some people even told me on Twitter I have an awesome shaped head and I'm rocking the look.

                I do get the odd look, the occasional "Jesus Loves You", and the nervousness of a few people (I'm thinking they might think I'm going through cancer treatments).

                Overall, I'm just happy with my hair. Will I do it again? Maybe. Maybe not.

                The one thing I do know is that my daughter (and husband) find me attractive with or without hair. And that, in my mind (and heart), is all that matters.
                Oh Holy Trinity, the Goddess Caffeine'Na, the Great Cowthulhu, & The Doctor, Who Art in Tardis, give me strength. Moo. Moo. Java. Timey Wimey

                Avatar says: DAVID TENNANT More Evidence God is a Woman

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                • #9
                  You should get a bunch of the little girl glittery fake tattoos and go to town with them now and then.

                  One of our ex roomies loved VWs, and on his left arm and shoulder he had a line art bug and the outline letter word Volkswagen in indigo blue. One time he fell asleep on the sofa and I had my collection of viscot markers from a stint in hospital so a friend and I colored in his tattoos =)

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                  • #10
                    It's the same for guys like me who grow their hair long. It was mostly my great-grandparents' generation, but there aren't very many of them left these days. About the only time I hear "Get a haircut!" anymore is jokingly from this one guy at the bar, whose hair is even longer than mine.
                    --- I want the republicans out of my bedroom, the democrats out of my wallet, and both out of my first and second amendment rights. Whether you are part of the anal-retentive overly politically-correct left, or the bible-thumping bellowing right, get out of the thought control business --- Alan Nathan

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                    • #11
                      If I had gone skin bald (not the stubble I have), I'd have gotten the temporary tattooes and gone wild with them on my head. xD

                      I now get to wear my dangle/chandelier earrings. Before, with my big poofy hair, no one could see them.
                      Oh Holy Trinity, the Goddess Caffeine'Na, the Great Cowthulhu, & The Doctor, Who Art in Tardis, give me strength. Moo. Moo. Java. Timey Wimey

                      Avatar says: DAVID TENNANT More Evidence God is a Woman

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by IDrinkaRum View Post
                        If I had gone skin bald (not the stubble I have), I'd have gotten the temporary tattooes and gone wild with them on my head. xD

                        I now get to wear my dangle/chandelier earrings. Before, with my big poofy hair, no one could see them.
                        I had about 20 flaming skull tattoos that someone gave me as a joke for Christmas for one year. I used to put them smack in the center of my forehead to screw with people I cut off the dangly part of the flames.

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                        • #13
                          I give a pass to small kids on this issue, as they're developmentally unable to process such a dramatic change easily. Other than that, your hair, your rules. And the idea that your husband get a say in what you do with your hair is laughable. Of course he gets an opinion, but whether or not you take it into account is all up to you.

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                          • #14
                            My mother asked the same thing ...

                            I sent 2 pictures of myself to my mother's e-mail last week. One was the picture from Mother's Day when all I had a bit of stubble and actually looked bald. The second picture was 3 weeks of hair growth.

                            My mother's reaction: "MR. RUM LET YOU DO THAT!? HOW CAN HE!? YOU ARE SEEN, IN PUBLIC, WITH HIM!"

                            I got off the phone really quickly.

                            *sighs*
                            Oh Holy Trinity, the Goddess Caffeine'Na, the Great Cowthulhu, & The Doctor, Who Art in Tardis, give me strength. Moo. Moo. Java. Timey Wimey

                            Avatar says: DAVID TENNANT More Evidence God is a Woman

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