oh the poor poor martyr

[kiwi]

I hate people who will refuse help just so they can come off as a martyr.

One of my close friends is an assistant to someone who has worked for the company for 30 years, he even moved to a new country 18 years ago for the company.

He has been told that he will be made redundant in May with pay.
In the 18 years he has stayed on a work visa, even though the company offered to pay for immigration costs once he got to the ten year mark.

The company even offered to pay for his immigration NOW even as he is being laid off.... but OHHHHH NO! HE couldnt possibly help him self in the slighest!

Now he has to go back to his original country. After three decades SLAVING away for a company, he lost his marriage and now his kids (they were born in the new country so they have citizenship) because he gave his "life and soul to the company"

He won't even go an see an immigration lawyer, he would much rather sulk and play the poor martyr so he can have everyone fawn over him and how sad he is. He is playing it up from her reports, he keeps telling anyone who will listen that he has given "everything" to the company and how do they repay him....

Boo freaking hoo buddy

If you are going to be so pathetic that you won't even try to help yourself or let someone else help you then I say good riddance!

Now I totally feel bad that he has lost his job, but I have no time or sympathy for people who "give everything" to a job.... its a job, if your marriage is on the rocks because of your job, GIVE IT UP, if you have no life because of your job, CUT BACK its a freaking job. It should NOT be your life, your life should be your family, and yourself

NOT some freaking place of business. If you go the extra mile then bully for you, but you should do it knowing that it's your choice to do it and you shouldn't expect loyalty from a business ever.

If you are willing to forfeit your time and health for a job then you are nuts! If you are willing to sacrifice a good marriage or relationship for a job you are an idiot and you have no one to blame but yourself.

I know that comes across harsh and blunt but I'm a blunt person and people who act in a pathetic manner really piss me off.

I can not stand people who want to bitch about a situation that sucks but that could be improved.... but ohhh no, then they cant play the martyr and get everyone's attention and pity. You suggest solutions until your blue in the face but they have an excuse at every single turn.

[smileyeagle1021]

I will disagree with you on one point. You should expect loyalty from your company, after all, they expect loyalty from you. That said, his company is showing loyalty, they really are going above and beyond by offering to pay his immigration costs so that he'll be able to get back on his feet easier after he is no longer needed by his company... they could have just as easily of said, "you're done in May, have a nice life, don't let the door hit you on the way out".

[Boozy]

This guy clearly wants to return to his home country. Perhaps he's been thinking about it for years. Perhaps he was almost relieved when he was laid off because it gave him an excuse to go. If he didn't want to return, the rational thing to do would have been to accept the immigration help. So he's obviously made a choice, and it's one that he's happy with.

[Slytovhand]

Kiwi - did you laugh at him? Just wondering how it would go down if he does the whingey whiney thing, and you laugh in his face at how pathetic he's been.

[kiwi]

I will disagree with you on one point. You should expect loyalty from your company, after all, they expect loyalty from you.

yeah but this guy made it known to everyone that he lost his marriage because he was at work so much, that his "life" was work

If you show that kind of loyalty to work your a sucker

I don't believe in showing loyalty to a job, don't get me wrong I'm a very hard worker, I will do every task I am assigned to the best of my ability.

But I am not going to trust that my employer would keep me employed a second longer than I was needed. If the business no longer needs you, your out the door. That's why I firmly believe that you look out for yourself, if a better job comes your way your better to take it.

This guy is a perfect example, he "gave his life" to the company for the best years of life, to a company that is now saying buh bye without a second glance. Sure they are offering to help out with his immigration costs but if they really "cared" about him they would be offering him another position or not letting him go.

I've seen it time and time again, people who go above and beyond who are let off because of the economy, or whatever... what does loyalty get you in business... a big fat nada when it comes down to it.

[Slytovhand]

Well, in reality, what do you expect? Loyalty can cost you a business - and I doubt people would truly be thinking "You've got to keep me on, even if it ruins you and sends you bankrupt".

[protege]

But I am not going to trust that my employer would keep me employed a second longer than I was needed. If the business no longer needs you, your out the door. That's why I firmly believe that you look out for yourself, if a better job comes your way your better to take it.

Thought I should comment on this There's no such thing as company loyalty any more. It used to be, that if you worked hard for a company, you'd get rewarded. Now, it doesn't matter. To many companies, they see their employees as simply "tools." That is, they use you until you're "worn out" or "made surplus." It's unfortunate, but true--there's not much you can do about it. There are *always* people willing to work at such firms. They know this, and that's why they get away with it.

We're going through this with my boss right now. He's one of those "would rather be working" people. He simply can't understand that while he lives to work, the rest of us work to live. In other words, he could easily retire, or take vacations. I should mention that this is the same guy, who, on 9/11, said that if it was up to him...he would have stayed in the office and continued working

I can understand *wanting* to work hard, but this goes well beyond that. Sorry, but my "company loyalty" lasts as long as I get paid. After 5:00, any problems simply aren't my problem. Most of that started...when the boss tried to get me to troubleshoot his equipment after hours. Got so bad, I had to tell my relatives that if he calls... I'm not home. Why work on weekends if I'm not getting paid?

I do know that his work attitude does drive his wife nuts. They can't have a "real" vacation, because he ends up working most of it. One of their last trips was to Italy. He'd stay up the *entire* night so he could stay in contact. Meaning, he didn't get any sleep, and missed out on many things. Call me crazy, but if I'm on vacation, I'm on vacation. The cell phone is off, and if you call me, I'm not answering.

[tabbyblack13]

I've read some of the post that this guy wants pity. There is also the factor that he worked for so long at this company that he cannot imagine himself working another job. Especially if he lost his wife over his job. Also he might have the old mentality that you are loyal to the company the company is loyal to you. He could be suffering from depression because this.

There has been 2 layoffs and 1 voluntary leave here. There were a lot of people acting as if they wouldn't get fired. Well, some of them did. There is also company housing here and those who got laid off have to leave the company houses. Let say that quite a few of those houses are uninhabitable due to garbage and damages .

I can't blame the company for trying to survive and if I wasn't necessary then I can't blame them for firing me. The company is only loyal to you if it needs you. Many companies are constantly monitoring their employees to make sure that company information stays in the company. Also if a company goes under more people will lose there jobs.

Protege - I've meet various people like that. My professors to several of my bosses. They have made there work apart of there life. Unfortunately sometimes their jobs take over their life and they cannot separate the two. I even have this problem and have taken phone calls when I was suppose to be with my family. My Mom thinks that its hilarious that they can't stop calling me for one week or follow directions to call someone else.